So... it's been over 5 months since my last blog post... a lot has happened... I'll explain... hopefully.
The reason I quit blogging was because I had a bit of a breakdown. I wasn't doing well in the clinic or in school. I couldn't, or possibly just wouldn't handle the pressure of it all. And honestly, looking back on it, making it so far only to come home without finishing hurt. I was really disappointed in myself.
I've been home since mid March. What have I been doing since then? Sitting in the back of MorningStar, not making friends, crying, attempting to finish school, having more breakdowns, crying more, putting school on hold for a few months, trying to find a job, praying a lot, listening to a lot of music, trying to get back in to art and writing, crying into my cat's fur, lots of reading, getting my apprenticeship license and volunteering at the local midwifery clinic, and over all just trying to put my life back in order because it's a mess right now.
I know some people are going to be worried about me since I said I'm not making friends and mentioned crying three separate times. I'm honestly actually ok. Crying is good for me. I wanted to cry a lot more in the Philippines than I actually did so I'm catching up on that. As far as the friends thing goes... I'm working on it. Slowly. It's not like I have no friends at all. :P
In happier news, I applied for and received my SC apprenticeship license. This is very good! I've been volunteering at the local midwifery clinic and that's been going great! I've even been able to attend a birth. It's really good for me to see how birth works here in the states as well. I may even have the opportunity to shadow a labor and delivery nurse at one of the local hospitals! That would be great since I've never been to any hospital births.
Now that I have my apprenticeship license I can actually do stuff around the clinic. And if you're pregnant I can even deliver your baby! (under my supervisor's supervision of course) Actually, if you're pregnant and are looking for a midwife... I still need a few clinical numbers so... help a sister out? Heh.
Anywho, I'm actually going to attempt to start blogging again. I'll try to keep you all updated on how school and clinical stuff is going as well as... you know... life... and all that... We'll see. I probably won't be falling into any sewage ditches here in Fort Mill so this blog probably won't be as interesting to read. Whatever. Writing's good for me so... bleh.
Getting it together,
Ashton